I'm one of those people that loves the Christmas holiday season. I love the music and the lights and the decorating and the cold weather and the excitement and atmosphere and I love getting gifts for people. I have a lot of fond memories of Christmas with my family as a kid growing up.
Unfortunately when I was a teenager my parents divorced, and several years ago I lost my mom, who loved Christmas and decorating and the holiday season like I do. In the years since, the holidays with my cynical dad, stepmom, and my brothers have been lower-key and not as fun.
This is the first December where I'll be completely by myself. I'm in an apartment so I can't decorate the exterior like I could a house, and decorating the interior is pointless because nobody will see it but me. I'll be alone on Christmas with nobody to celebrate with, nobody to exchange gifts with. Just me in a bland empty apartment. Most of my friends are really just acquaintances and they'll all be off with their own families. Being alone just serves to make me feel like nobody really cares or would even notice if I was gone. It's just frustrating and depressing.
I don't know why I'm making this thread, I just wanted to vent.
Unfortunately when I was a teenager my parents divorced, and several years ago I lost my mom, who loved Christmas and decorating and the holiday season like I do. In the years since, the holidays with my cynical dad, stepmom, and my brothers have been lower-key and not as fun.
This is the first December where I'll be completely by myself. I'm in an apartment so I can't decorate the exterior like I could a house, and decorating the interior is pointless because nobody will see it but me. I'll be alone on Christmas with nobody to celebrate with, nobody to exchange gifts with. Just me in a bland empty apartment. Most of my friends are really just acquaintances and they'll all be off with their own families. Being alone just serves to make me feel like nobody really cares or would even notice if I was gone. It's just frustrating and depressing.
I don't know why I'm making this thread, I just wanted to vent.