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A friend cut me off over my stance against circumcision

Liquid Plejades

Liquid Plejades

Member
Mar 3, 2018
4,512
Didn't realize the thread title joke until I wrote it honestly....anyway;

was talking to a friend I've know for 4-5 years, and they were telling me about their marriage plans and having kids this year. Topic switched to raising kids, and they had some questions from me since I work with kids, so they wanted to talk about how they were nervous about having kids and just being a good parent. They made a comment about circumcision and I told them how I was against it even though it was done to me....this is where their mood suddenly changed and got very serious. I honestly have rarely seen my friend like this in the past few years. They told me how it's their religion and it's unthinkable to even suggest that. I wasn't attacking their choice, but just said "hey it was done to me as a child due to my parents religion. I just wish I had a choice in the matter and I will give that choice to my child" and then they went on to say how every man they know in their community doesn't complain about it and it's not that big of a deal.

fast forward to today I get a message from them about how upset they were and still are with my stance against this matter, and don't see how we can still be friends since me being against circumcision equals me being against their religion and culture...?? I responded back to the text saying how I don't care about their religion or have anything against it, just don't believe in circumcision. The last text they sent me was how they are to utterly disappointed because they were looking forward to me possibly being their child's teacher someday at my school, and teaching them things etc but now that can't happen.

Like seriously, holy fuck. I've never seen someone do such a shift in their attitude. I get that some people are religious and passionate about it, but bruh...I'm legit speechless right now and don't know how to process this. I thought circumcision wasn't as controversial anymore and less and less people were doing it but I guess I was wrong.
 
Lunaray

Lunaray

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,731
Yeah, if they're breaking off their friendship with you over them being pro genital mutilation, I'd say it's fine to move on.
 
Secret Squirrel

Secret Squirrel

Member
Jul 19, 2018
1,203
Your friend sounds like a massive drama queen. Believe what you want, but you can't get stroppy when someone doesn't share your precise view ffs
 

Deleted member 4367

User requested account closure
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
12,226
I think a lot of people do understand how weird and messed up it is and so they get super defensive when people point out how bad things about circumcision.
 
Poppy

Poppy

Member
Oct 25, 2017
18,268
richmond, va
people get very defensive over the strangest traditions, i wish this weird ass practice wasn't so closely tied to religion so it wouldn't have an excuse
 
Failburger

Failburger

Banned
Dec 3, 2018
2,455
Nothing get people more defensive then them defending the idea that of mutilating their children wasn't a terrible thing to do.
 
Yatahaze

Yatahaze

Member
Jun 17, 2018
356
The Dr botched my circumcision when I was a baby and when I confronted my mom about it she said I never had it done in the first place, but uhhh I clearly have.
 
Wracu

Wracu

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
2,396
User Banned (1 Month): Antisemitic Trope
Well, you've dodged a bullet here. Too bad about the kid about to have bits chopped off (and sold) because of the delusional beliefs of his parents.
 
Kingpin Rogers

Kingpin Rogers

HILF
Banned
Oct 27, 2017
7,459
What if someone needs to be circumcised for medical reasons? Are you still against it then? Do you just have a problem with the child not having a choice in the matter?
 
vypek

vypek

Member
Oct 25, 2017
12,537
Yeah, people get super intense about it. I've had it done to me and never ever really thought about it and it was a long time before I realized how controversial of a thing it was. Really sucks to get cut off over something like that when you weren't even attacking their religion and didn't have any ill will
 
AlteredBeast

AlteredBeast

Don't Watch the Tape!
Member
Oct 27, 2017
4,760
They sound like religious extremists or first generation immigrants? I don't care one way or the other, but the only people pushing it hardcore anymore almost always fall into one (or both) of those categories.
 
Papa Satanás

Papa Satanás

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
863
no
My SO had a longtime bestie who ditched him cuz he would watch porn even though he had a gf.

It was me, I was the gf, and we watched it together. I told her that, and she still thought it was reprehensible despite my very obvious approval. So she broke up the friendship.
 

Absolute

Banned
Nov 6, 2017
2,090
A friendship ending over not wanting to mutilate genitals was probably a friendship not worth investing in. Sorry that happened you OP.
 

TronLight

Member
Jun 17, 2018
2,457
Secret Squirrel said:
Maybe read the first line of the post
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Liquid Plejades said:
As I said in the first sentence, Ididnt intent it to be that way until I wrote it and realized what I wrote. I mean they are I feed "cutting me off" over this.
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Lol I read the whole post but I skipped just the first line.

Anyway I agree with most of the other posts, circumcision for non medical reasons is stupid. Being against it is not an attack towards a religion, unless that's your intention.
 
Betty

Betty

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
17,604
Circumcision made sense back in the olden days when hygiene was more if an issue.

It should be left up to the individual if they want it done.

But I realise I'm fighting against the tide here and don't get too heated about it.
 
cognizant

cognizant

Member
Dec 19, 2017
13,751
I don't have any skin in this game, but seems to me if it wasn't this issue to cause a split in your relationship, it would have been another issue down the line. They took your comments as a slight against their entire religion because (to them) one aspect of their religion is connected to another. So being so dismissive of circumcision was like being dismissive of their kid and in turn dismissive of their parenting, etc, etc.

It's upsetting to see someone piss away a friendship, but ultimately it's probably for the best that they circumcised you out of their life.
 
MizneyWorld

MizneyWorld

Banned
Oct 28, 2017
446
Blowing up a friendship over hypothetical foreskin is certainly something.

Sounds like he needs to learn that others also have beliefs that need to be respected.
 
LewieP

LewieP

Member
Oct 26, 2017
18,093
Can someone explain to me the notion that if people are religious they are pro-circumcision?

Surely God got it right so people's bits should be left au natural? I don't see why you should hassle anyone else for their decisions.

To the best of my knowledge very few people where I come from get circumcised outside of Jewish families, and I got the sense that it's as much of a cultural thing as it is a religious thing for them. Also it's a choice families make for themselves, rather than trying to convince others to do it too.

It's not something I really ask people about much.
 
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Balma

Balma

Member
Oct 27, 2017
714
Pro circumcision people are crazy. The justification always seem to be "it was done to me" which is the same bullshit excuse for foot binding back in the day.
 

JTMarlin

Member
Nov 6, 2018
50
LewieP said:
Can someone explain to me the notion that if people are religious they are pro-circumcision?

Surely God got it right so people's bits should be left au natural?

To the best of my knowledge very few people get circumcised outside of Jewish families, and I got the sense that it's as much of a cultural thing as it is a religious thing for them. Also it's a choice families make for themselves, rather than trying to convince others to do it too.

It's not something I really ask people about much.
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In the US 81 percent of males are circumcised. 2 percent of the population is Jewish.
 
Secret Squirrel

Secret Squirrel

Member
Jul 19, 2018
1,203
LewieP said:
Can someone explain to me the notion that if people are religious they are pro-circumcision?

Surely God got it right so people's bits should be left au natural?

To the best of my knowledge very few people get circumcised outside of Jewish families, and I got the sense that it's as much of a cultural thing as it is a religious thing for them. Also it's a choice families make for themselves, rather than trying to convince others to do it too.

It's not something I really ask people about much.
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It's pretty common in the US

Morris and his colleagues found the circumcision rate in newborns has declined from 83 percent in the 1960s to 77 percent in 2010. (The overall rate among U.S. males age 14 to 59 is 81 percent, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.)

Additionally, the data suggests there is a racial disparity driven primarily by access to procedure and cultural and educational factors. Circumcision rates over the last decade reached 91 percent in white men, 76 percent in black men and only 44 percent in Hispanic men.

That's from 2014
 

Deleted member 8752

User requested account closure
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User banned (1 week): peddling dangerous medical misinformation
LewieP said:
Can someone explain to me the notion that if people are religious they are pro-circumcision?

Surely God got it right so people's bits should be left au natural?

To the best of my knowledge very few people get circumcised outside of Jewish families, and I got the sense that it's as much of a cultural thing as it is a religious thing for them. Also it's a choice families make for themselves, rather than trying to convince others to do it too.

It's not something I really ask people about much.
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First, he's probably Jewish or Islamic. Both religions have their traditions.

In Europe, sure, it's rare outside Jewish communities.

In the US however, it's very common even among non-Jews. That is because there is medical evidence that suggests it's more hygienic. In fact, MOST men in the USA are circumcised. Like 80-90% of the male population in the country are.

Statistically, half of all non-circumcised men will contract a medical condition related to their foreskin. It should be considered equivalent to a vaccination - sure it's optional, but it's not smart to not get a circumcision if the opportunity is present.
 
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