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Sometimes the Tesla car is out to murder you

RyougaSaotome

RyougaSaotome

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,071
So I get home from the gym, park the car in the driveway, and head inside to enjoy my Taco Bell lunch.

Approximately 10 minutes later, I hear a giant smash outside, the whole house shakes, and in a panic, me and the rest of the family run outside to see what happened.


View: https://youtu.be/y9BzFkuAOVE

Turns out, a Tesla self-drove itself onto our sidewalk, smashed through the fire hydrant, the tree, and continued down the street for a few more meters after setting off its airbags for the elderly folks inside.

Fortunately, nobody was hurt, but if I got home even a little later than I did, I'd be a fucking corpse.

Tesla cars, baybeeeeeeee.
 
Strike

Strike

Member
Oct 25, 2017
28,441
Our dystopian reality is already here in many ways. Beta testing self-driving cars on public roads shouldn't be legal.
 
L Thammy

L Thammy

Spacenoid
Member
Oct 25, 2017
51,853
Okay, I know this is a serious concern and I'm glad you're okay, but now I can't help but imagine a horror movie where the monster is just a Tesla trying to kill everybody. Not because the car's AI is particularly evil but just because it's been pushed to market when it clearly isn't ready.
 
Bishop89

Bishop89

What Are Ya' Selling?
Member
Oct 25, 2017
38,309
Melbourne, Australia
nTwIt1f.gif
 
grang

grang

Member
Nov 13, 2017
11,438
L Thammy said:
Okay, I know this is a serious concern and I'm glad you're okay, but now I can't help but imagine a horror movie where the monster is just a Tesla trying to kill everybody. Not because the car's AI is particularly evil but just because it's been pushed to market when it clearly isn't ready.
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There's a scene like that in a recent Netflix thriller (jesus actually it was released like 9 months ago, time is weird)

Leave the World Behind features a scene with a weaponized lot of smart cars
 

PtM

Banned
Dec 7, 2017
4,218
Just today I've been thinking I shouldn't jaywalk next to one of those.
 
Scottoest

Scottoest

Member
Feb 4, 2020
12,010
Why do people keep enabling "autopilot" in Tesla cars and then just letting Jesus take the wheel?
 
OP
OP
RyougaSaotome

RyougaSaotome

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,071
L Thammy said:
Okay, I know this is a serious concern and I'm glad you're okay, but now I can't help but imagine a horror movie where the monster is just a Tesla trying to kill everybody. Not because the car's AI is particularly evil but just because it's been pushed to market when it clearly isn't ready.
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Homie, that was the only thing on my mind.

A few years back I got caught up in a drive-by shooting between two random groups early in the evening and managed to escape by doing a clumsy diveroll behind the shed in our backyard, and now the cars are trying to merc me too?

Come on, now.
 
pioneer

pioneer

Member
May 31, 2022
5,361
I am for automated cars, but I don't think they should be publicly available yet… clearly people can't be trusted to use these features responsibly
 
OP
OP
RyougaSaotome

RyougaSaotome

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,071
So the freaky thing about this is that our street is BIG on pedestrian traffic. Right in front of our house is a special needs school, and when the kids get out, they're all over the place.

We also spend a lot of time outside, so do the kids in the neighborhood, etc.

This had the potential to be a MASSIVE tragedy in all the worst ways, and the only reason it wasn't was because we got lucky on the timing.

Horrifying to even think about.
 
OP
OP
RyougaSaotome

RyougaSaotome

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,071
the tow trucks finally came to collect the corpse of the Tesla car, its bits and pieces still all over our sidewalk.

Plus side, we're getting a new fire hydrant? lol
 
Dan-o

Dan-o

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,215
RyougaSaotome said:
the tow trucks finally came to collect the corpse of the Tesla car, its bits and pieces still all over our sidewalk.

Plus side, we're getting a new fire hydrant? lol
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Surprised it took that long. 'round here, those tow trucks are out in full force, ready to haul away the vehicles before the scene has been properly documented.
 
Foolhardy

Foolhardy

Member
May 4, 2024
1,616
Holy shit, OP. On both of those close calls.

L Thammy said:
Okay, I know this is a serious concern and I'm glad you're okay, but now I can't help but imagine a horror movie where the monster is just a Tesla trying to kill everybody. Not because the car's AI is particularly evil but just because it's been pushed to market when it clearly isn't ready.
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What if Christine was just really stupid?
 
OP
OP
RyougaSaotome

RyougaSaotome

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,071

Ashhong

Member
Oct 26, 2017
17,453
Just curious, how do you know it was in auto pilot? I find it very strange the car would continue to go down the street in auto pilot after already hitting multiple obstructions and on the sidewalk
 
OP
OP
RyougaSaotome

RyougaSaotome

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,071
Ashhong said:
Just curious, how do you know it was in auto pilot? I find it very strange the car would continue to go down the street in auto pilot after already hitting multiple obstructions and on the sidewalk
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It's what the old lady and her family told us after we helped them out of the car.

Obviously, they could have had the wrong idea, which is a different set of problems. lol

I'm just taking what they said at face value because otherwise I have no fucking clue how any of this works.
 
firehawk12

firehawk12

Member
Oct 25, 2017
26,289
Totally off topic, but your voice triggered a memory of Red Sun Gamer podcast for me that I didn't know I still had in my brain. lol

Glad you're okay!
 
Kasumin

Kasumin

Member
Nov 19, 2017
2,203
I can't help but conclude that Tesla cars are channeling Musk's hatred for humanity in general.

Glad you're okay, OP. Glad the drivers are okay, too.
 
m_shortpants

m_shortpants

Member
Oct 25, 2017
12,749
Ashhong said:
Just curious, how do you know it was in auto pilot? I find it very strange the car would continue to go down the street in auto pilot after already hitting multiple obstructions and on the sidewalk
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Yeah, and given that they're elderly, it wouldn't be the first time someone accidentally pressed the throttle when they meant to brake, etc.
 
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OP
RyougaSaotome

RyougaSaotome

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,071
RyougaSaotome said:
It's what the old lady and her family told us after we helped them out of the car.

Obviously, they could have had the wrong idea, which is a different set of problems. lol

I'm just taking what they said at face value because otherwise I have no fucking clue how any of this works.
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m_shortpants said:
Yeah, and given that they're elderly, it wouldn't be the first time someone accidentally pressed the throttle when they meant to brake, etc.
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This. Like you said, they could've also just been lying, or didn't realize or something. Fortunately, not my problem to figure out. lol
 
rhindle

rhindle

Member
Oct 27, 2017
375
Eh ... I'd want to see the receipts for this.

If there was an old guy behind the wheel, I'll take any bet that he was driving and lost control of the car. Tesla self-driving does some weird shit sometimes, but nothing remotely like this.
 
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